Five Stages of Home Selling Grief

Written By Pal Sheldon

There are many reasons why you may decide to sell your home. Perhaps you have outgrown the space and are looking for more rooms to accommodate new additions to your family. Maybe you have seen the last of your children leave to start their own new lives as adults and want to downgrade to something that suits the 'just us' vibe. You may need to relocate for a prosperous job opening that you just can't refuse!

Regardless of the reason for selling, it can be tough to let go and move on.

If you are experiencing moments of feeling overwhelmed by an upcoming move, know that you are not alone. Because relocating has become such a common part of our modern human condition we tend to overshadow our feelings with an impulse to just 'do what needs to be done'.

Accepting that any transition carries with it the weight of natural, human emotion can help you to see that your feelings are also valuable. You may find that taking the time to sort through these feelings is just as necessary a part of moving as sorting through the kitchen cupboards, discarding possessions that are no longer useful.

We regularly work with clients to help them to sort out the tangible and intangible aspects of selling their home. Determining your motivations to sell can help in taking the first steps in moving towards the future. Facing your darkest emotions head on may give you the opportunity to be your best self and achieve the goal of selling your home.

 

Denial

As Mark Twain once said, “Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt.” When you are in the process of selling your home, you will undoubtedly come across some harsh realities. Perhaps there are more repairs needed than you anticipated, or maybe the market is not delivering your ideal listing price. Denial in these moments is normal, though time is of the essence when your home is under contract. If you don't have a trusted Home Inspector, reach out to your realtor to suggest someone who will work with you to outline a list of necessary repairs before you list the home on the market. You can push off the realities of your situation and pull the covers over your head for about one sleepless night before you press on to the next stage...

As Mark Twain once said, “Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt.” When you are in the process of selling your home, you will undoubtedly come across some harsh realities. Perhaps there are more repairs needed than you anticipated, or maybe the market is not delivering your ideal listing price. Denial in these moments is normal, though time is of the essence when your home is under contract. If you don't have a trusted Home Inspector, reach out to your realtor to suggest someone who will work with you to outline a list of necessary repairs before you list the home on the market. You can push off the realities of your situation and pull the covers over your head for about one sleepless night before you press on to the next stage...

 

Anger

This is the “WHY ME!” stage. If you are selling your home it is certainly for a very expressed purpose. You may be relocating your family because of a job offer, upgrading to make room for new family members, or downgrading to reduce the high costs of living. Time constraints like these can leave anyone feeling very stressed. In these moments it is important to allow your feelings to rise and fall. Though it may seem cliche, consider taking a long walk, going to the gym or finding a way to relieve this unwanted stress.Remember: This too shall pass.Working with a diligent and patient Realtor can certainly help! Your agent is a resource who can help to see you through these emotional struggles by processing you through to the next stage...

This is the “WHY ME!” stage. If you are selling your home it is certainly for a very express purpose. You may be relocating your family because of a job offer, upgrading to make room for new family members, or downgrading to reduce the high costs of living. Time constraints like these can leave anyone feeling very stressed. In these moments it is important to allow your feelings to rise and fall. Though it may seem cliche, consider taking a long walk, going to the gym, or finding a way to relieve this unwanted stress.

Remember: This too shall pass.

Working with a diligent and patient Realtor can certainly help! Your agent is a resource who can help to see you through these emotional struggles by processing you through to the next stage...

 

Bargaining

Regardless of the housing market or the pressing demands of your prospective buyer, the home that you are selling is still yours. You hold the cards! If you decide that the time is not right, or if some of the requested repairs are simply cosmetic and you don't feel like you should have to foot the bill, your real estate agent can help you negotiate your home's contract in a way that reflects your terms. The right agent will act as your coach, outlining the best strategies for reaching your sales goals. They are there to hold you up and make sure that you know that you are in control.

Regardless of the housing market or the pressing demands of your prospective buyer, the home that you are selling is still yours. You hold the cards! If you decide that the time is not right, or if some of the requested repairs are simply cosmetic and you don't feel like you should have to foot the bill, your real estate agent can help you negotiate your home's contract in a way that reflects your terms. The right agent will act as your coach, outlining the best strategies for reaching your sales goals. They are there to hold you up and make sure that you know that you are in control.

 

Depression

Even when you have made or exceeded your goals of the listing price it can be a struggle to come to terms with the realities of moving out. Our homes are sanctuaries. Whether we grew up in these homes, watched our young ones mature up the kitchen doorframe, or are taking care of the last wills of our deceased relatives, it can be sad to leave a home well lived in. Once a home is under contract there is little time left to be sentimental about the home that you have just sold. A best practice to help curb the realities of this stage is to start the processes of packing up your home early. The less personal belongings that are in the home during the sales process, the easier it can be to remove your emotional ties to the space. Stage your home to sell before listing it on the market by gaining insight from your Realtor. Then you can begin imagining your belongings settling in their next home.

Even when you have made or exceeded your goals of the listing price it can be a struggle to come to terms with the realities of moving out. Our homes are sanctuaries. Whether we grew up in these homes, watched our young ones mature up the kitchen doorframe, or are taking care of the last wills of our deceased relatives, it can be sad to leave a home well lived in. Once a home is under contract there is little time left to be sentimental about the home that you have just sold. A best practice to help curb the realities of this stage is to start the processes of packing up your home early. The less personal belongings that are in the home during the sales process, the easier it can be to remove your emotional ties to the space. Stage your home to sell before listing it on the market by gaining insight from your Realtor. Then you can begin imagining your belongings settling in their next home.

 

Acceptance

Coming to the stage of acceptance allows you to design hopeful plans for life in your new home. Here, we leave you with yet another Mark Twain quote, "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." - Mark Twain

Coming to the stage of acceptance allows you to design hopeful plans for life in your new home. Here, we leave you with yet another Mark Twain quote, "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." - Mark Twain

Ready To Sell Your Home? We Can Help.

Whatever stage of home-selling grief you’re in, a good realtor can help. If you’re ready to assemble your team of Real Estate Rockstars, get in touch! Zelda and her Rock Star team at Benchmark Realty can help you navigate the emotional ups and downs of selling your home to help you get the best price for your house.

Pal Sheldon
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